Serious case of mistaken identity

Professor: Josh, we'll send it to the finance guy for this one.

Josh Kruse: Uh, I'm HR.

Professor: Really?

Brandon Wells: he can give you a hug but that's about it.

The value of operations

Professor:  what does operations do?
Brandon Wells:  Nothing
Professor:  (didn't hear) What was that?
Brandon Wells:  I mean, besides playing Root Beer games.....

We all wish we were Howard

Brandon Wells: I hate being a white male. I wish I was Asian like Howard (Kuan).

That came out wrong

Brandon Wells (referring to Malorie's Boise State shirt): Malorie, take that shirt off right now! (pause) I mean, put something else on too of course...  That came out wrong

Marital exit strategies

Brandon Wells: If you're going to be a trophy wife, you need to sit courtside (at an NBA game), not in the nosebleeds. How are the players going to see you?

Janessa Cloward: I'm not sure that'll work...what about that whole flirt-to-convert thing?

Brandon: If he's in the NBA, you know he'll cheat on you, so just don't get a pre-nup. You'll get a divorce in a year and end up with his money, and then you can marry your good little Mormon boy.

Janessa and Brittany Riggs: I guess that works...

Brandon: It's called an exit strategy, ladies. Welcome to business school.

When in Rome...

Brandon Wells:  The Romans gave us the aqueducts and the monogamy..... 2 out-of-date things.

Sure you are Brandon!

Brandon Wells: "I should have done HR.  Oh, wait, but I'm not a mariposa."

SWASS

Brandon Wells: Did you go to the gym yesterday?

Jenny Clawson: Yes - but people got the bikes all sweaty - plus there was SWASS all over the seat!

Friendly Advice

Brandon Wells: When are you going to the temple?

Janessa Cloward: I need to have a heart-to-heart with my bishop.

Brandon Wells: Sounds like you need to have a heart-to-heart with your Heavenly Father first.

Full House

Brandon Wells:  Brandon Anderson...Branderson!

Brandon Anderson:  Yeah, that was a nickname from high school.

Brandon W:  Consider yourself lucky.  My nickname was Bob Saget.  I've grown into my Jewish nose a bit since then.

Active Listening

Professor:  I guess that's what it means to be an E-MBA - you can ignore the professor.

Brandon Wells:  What was that?  I wasn't listening.

Mmmm...Bacon...

It's a dog-eat-dog world, and I'm wearing bacon underwear.

- Brandon Wells